All, Bipolar Hot Mess Daily Life, Random Musings, Relationships (Love)

Every Night I Am Afraid

Yes. I am afraid. It’s bedtime and I’m terrified. This is the time I always become the most afraid. I lay in bed while I begin to panic and cry because I am afraid that he is going to forget me. That he is going to forget how much he loves me, forget what it feels like to love me, forget…

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All, Bipolar Disorder, Featured

Its Only Been a Month, How is this happening so soon?!

Last month, I was admitted to the psychiatric hospital for a variety of reasons.  I was extremely suicidal, severely depressed, my medications were not working properly, and I just couldn’t get my bipolar disorder roller coaster under control.  Not a novice to the whole “hospital” thing (I had 2 visits previously at another location) I knew that I had to…

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All, Bipolar Disorder, Random Musings, Relationship (friendships), Relationships (Love)


Musings from an old journal…. timewarp back to 2007….. Grrr…. always thinkin….. but, I guess its good to think and get it all out rather than keepin it all in and building up. I just can’t focus tonight and I can’t sleep because I know I have homework that needs to be finished. I read a page, then re-read the…

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