Closing the Door

The last bag is packed, the boxes all taped Every thought about every mistake I look around the cold and empty room No longer home, the bride leaving the groom There’s suddenly no air, my lungs, I can’t breathe My legs begin to tremor so I can not leave The desyncappated beat of whats left of my heart The pieces of my life scattered, all broken apart Close the door, drive away, all the tears… Continue Reading

The Giving Tree

You think everything is going ok.  Laughing, smiling, learning each other’s schedules, finding out when they need a hug and when they need their space, and talking…communicating….about everything (or you thought everything).  Finally, for the first time in over a year, you feel stronger.  The past no longer makes your stomach turn and tears form in your eyes.  You don’t get sad and defeated.  There is someone who finally, after 8+ years, tells you that… Continue Reading

Graduating From Therapy! *from the archives*

From the Hot Mess Archives! Yippie! I am FINALLY graduating on March 20! I am so glad and feel such a sense of accomplishment. However, I am still sad. My parents, bro and sis are going to be there, which is awesome, but there is one person that I want to be there, that isn’t. They have to work. Its disappointing because I want that person to share the excitement of how far I have… Continue Reading

Story of My Life……

Yes. This is the story of my life, and I’m not being specific to men in my life. Friends, family, anyone that I care about. That seems to be my problem. I give everything, too much in fact. I give so much that I lose track and sight of myself and who I am. Then I feel constantly let down when I need someone to be there, and no one is there. I can’t expect… Continue Reading

They said it would be better

Yes. They all said that after my divorce was final, I would feel better.  But I don’t.  I feel just the same; if not worse.  They said I would feel a huge weight lifted off me.  But I don’t.  Instead I feel an ever greater weight on me…..an enormous attorney bill contributing to it all.  They said it would be a brand new, fresh start, but it isn’t.  Its the same thing it was the… Continue Reading

Behind The Front

Sitting here on my bed Contemplating being dead Crying and weeping, lots of tears No one is here to calm my fears I’m all alone trying to succeed But all I feel is great defeat I’ve put on a front, a happy person shows Hurting and in pain is what a person knows I’m afraid of the future, can’t deal with my past Thoughts and emotion spin so fast I walk through each day in… Continue Reading

Empty Soul

The empty soul not knowing where to go Plummeting down to a place so low Lonliness is all around People she cares for no where around Continuous sadness of what used to be Trying to get there but the light unseen. All alone for all are scared Even when happy no one cared An empty house and feelings of dread No one to help, might as well be dead. Everything she does is never enough……… Continue Reading

Tears I Cry

I’m sorry for the tears I cry To remain strong, so hard I try. But if you are in trouble, it bothers me so Because the thought of losing you Hurts more than you know. You are my everything, my inspiration, my love And I would stand by you when push comes to shove. For every night when I go to sleep I want to stay in your arms, and be yours to keep. Because… Continue Reading

Time Goes On

Full of sorrow The days drag on Full of lonliness The months go by Full of tears The years drift away Full of rage The decades fly Full of hurt The centuries die Full of happiness Those seconds are gone Full of laughter Those minutes have left Full of pain My life is now done. Copyright secured by Digiprove © 2013  Related posts: Untitled 3 Closing the Door Falling Deeper Lost My Soul Empty Soul