Well, I don’t know if I should be offended that the #1 post is not even about me, but is dedicated to my best friend and her now husband. I mean, it is my blog and all, shouldn’t I be the star?! hahaha.
One thing we all have to realize is that being a star is not always about being the center of attention.
Being a star means being a good example, a positive influence on others, to inspire others, helping others through good times and bad, but most and most important of all, it means being your best self; standing for all the values and beliefs you have and not letting the world drag you down when you don’t see eye to eye on them. Being a star means rising up and being the best that you can be as a person, as a partner, as a friend, as a sibling, as a child, maybe as a parent, and as an employee or employer, as a role model or teacher, or even just as a neighbor. You do the best that you can and that is all you can do.
You can not let anyone make you feel bad or inadequate because you will always know that you’ve done all that you can and did it the best that you can.
You should be proud of that. That is what makes you a star. You don’t always need to be in the spotlight. Sometimes being there for others means more and the sentiment lasts longer than a few short minutes in the spotlight. Take it from me.
I am an expert in standing in the sidelines, but that’s what makes me who I am today. I give to others before I give to myself.
I take care of others before I take care of myself. I try to fix everyone in the world and fix all the problems of the world before I try to fix my own. I have been told that I do this to a fault and that I don’t take care of myself enough. When I do try to take care of myself and do something for myself, the voice of my conscience tells me that I am being selfish. Sometimes others around me may even tell me that I am being selfish. I used to let that get the best of me and feel incredibly horrible about anything I did for myself. (Which kind of defeats the purpose of doing something for yourself. I mean, you do it to improve yourself and not feel worse about yourself.) But I have realized that I can’t keep letting others judgments define me or dictate what I do or say. They don’t always see the big picture or see what’s going on in the sidelines. They don’t always see all the work I do to help other that I don’t publicize. So, I can’t keep letting other’s judgments be the dictators of my life. If I did, then I am not really being myself, but being a version of myself that others want or expect me to be. And that’s definitely not being my true self. The problem is, when you do that for so very long, its hard to determine who that true self really is because its been so modified.
As I looked through the posts on this page, I realized that so much happened in 2011,
as did every other year, but this past year, I tried really hard to find my true self. I still am not 100% there, but I am getting there. Soon I will find it. Its like an onion. peeling back all the layers until you get to the core and there is nothing left to peel away. Each layer contains another piece of myself. I just have to keep peeling until all the layers have been revealed. So, join me this year in peeling away more layers and finding my true self, while still doing all the things I do best, helping others in their own struggles to make their lives better and making people laugh with my crazy adventures of daily life. Until then, here is a recap of the top 5 (6 because of the tie) most viewed blog posts of 2011!!
#1 – The top post…
This post was written when I found out about the engagement of my best friend and the love of her life. I was so happy for her and the happiness that she found, as well as the lil peanut growing inside her (that will be saying hello to the world in February), that I had to show my love for a friend. Not only is she one of my best friends, but she also is the one who started with the Pocket Christi concept which then led to the Bipolar Hot Mess blog. She was the one who always said she wished she had a little Christi to keep in her pocket to always help her out. Without her cheering me on and asking for my help, Pocket Christi may not have ever come about, and neither would have Bipolar Hot Mess!
So, here is the link for the post…
#2 – This post was written…
after I had just listened to a barrage of misrepresentations about me and misunderstandings. I was hurt by the way I was viewed and portrayed and hurt that the reality of things was being overlooked, for the reality painted a completely different picture.
Here is the link for that post….
#3 – This was the result of me asking a much younger friend of mine for some help in editing a video.
Whenever I need tech help, I always ask those younger than me. They have grown up with technology and are usually much more adept at it than I am. This is how the conversation went down…
Here is the link for that post.…..
#4 – In this post, I wonder why I have such vivid dreams about things from the past.
What can they mean?
The link for the post ….
#5 – part 1 –
This post was written the day the announcement was made that I was now a partner at Ask A Bipolar! I was so excited!! And proud! 🙂
The link for the post …..
#5 – part 2 – This post is a not so happy one. This post is an apology to my friends and family for being such a shit head.
I crawled into a cave and began letting people down at that time and felt horrible about it. I didn’t know how or what would fix it, but I knew I had to do something. And that something started with apologizing to the ones I let down…..